Charlie's Bird
living the dream with Charlie and Thandi and chirping all the way back to the nest.Archive for December, 2020
Mixed feelings
…as we close the door on this year; this year that no-one could possibly have prepared for; this year that has broken so many promises, so many people, so many hearts…
I haven’t blogged for. bit, and I guess that’s because the events of the past few days have left me speechless. Christmas came and went in a subdued form, the tinsel didn’t sparkle quite the same, the festive fun was lacking, but it was still a nice day, and Thandi had a wonderful time. We did some visiting of friends and family around the actual day – a 50th on the 24th, a visit to the in-laws who are staying at Hogsback on the 26th, and a visit to a family friend on the 27th.
The morning of the 28th dawned overcast and drizzly, I got a run in, and then headed off to do a big case on a young cancer patient, even though I was officially on leave. It was a tough case with 4 surgeons all working on her, myself and a gynae oncologist, a general surgeon and a colorectal surgeon. 4 hours later we had finished a very difficult, but successful surgery. I headed home, and then quickly got packed for our holiday on an isolated guest farm in the Winterberg region. We enjoyed a wonderful first evening with our friends.
Tuesday morning, I had a lovely walk around the mountain, and then just as we were finishing breakfast, Charlie got a call from my dad’s carer to say that he was experiencing some chest pain. Now, we are 3 hours away, there is almost no-one I can think of to call and ask for help… floundering. Charlie called a friend of his who knows my dad, so he went along, I arranged some paramedics to pop in too, they checked him out, things sounded pretty ominous, so now, what to do – we’re en route, through dodgy signal zones. I call his cardiologist – admitting him isn’t ideal with Covid etc, his GP has retired, the replacement emigrated, so, I call on the now seniors in the old practice – they agree to see him and work him up, and if necessary, we’ll admit him, with a covid result, directly to the cardiac unit. Knowing how stubborn the old man is, I am astounded that our friend got him into the car and off to the doctor, but, thankfully he did. As we arrive back in town, the GP calls to say, he’s ok, it looks like his heart has just gone out of rhythm, and that’s what made him feel bad, but that we will do the bloods and work up anyway, but that we can take him home. As the results come in, we hear the news that he has indeed had a heart attack, a small one, and that is what threw his heart out of rhythm. But all is good, and he’s ok, and we continue with our plan, keeping him at home, on some meds. So, we plan to spend the night at home and head back to the farm after checking on him in the morning.
Until… I get a message from the gynae oncologist telling me that while he felt fine all day on Monday, he noticed he had lost his sense of smell that evening, he tested on Tuesday and was now +. So, although I had been properly masked the entire surgery, 4 hours together is a long time, and we did unmask when having a cut of coffee afterwards, although, more than a meter apart during that time. But, in good conscience I couldn’t go back to my holiday. So Charlie has headed back to enjoy the time with our girl, who deserves an amazing holiday, and, me, I am at home. I’ve tidied up the sewing area/office/reading area, and now I am on the couch.
So, honestly, this year and all its complications can really just f&^%%k off now, but I’m not convinced that 2021 will bring anything better.
I trust wherever you are, you are safe and sound, and that 2021 does actually show improvements on the disaster zone of 2020.
Bah Humbug
…I feel like I am turning into the Grinch. Work this weekend was horrible, and I have so many things that have made me so angry. Things that are really challenging my belief in my fellow man.
- If you’re feeling sick during these times – with flu like symptoms – get the damn test done. Even if you don’t think it’s possible. Especially if you are a health care professional and are seeing patients.
- If you have tested positive, isolate, damnit. Don’t go to your daughter’s wedding sans mask and greet guests with gay abandon!
- If you’re feeling grotty, get tested, don’t host your inappropriately distanced baby shower first, spreading your germs to all your friends and family, before you get tested. There can always be another tea party, there may not be a granny at the next one…
- If you come to hospital and are struggling to breath and your baby is showing signs of compromise, do believe us when we tell you you most likely have Covid and that we need to admit you for both your and your baby’s health. Don’t, for the love of all things holy, tell us you need to take care of your 2 children at home (when you should be isolating) and leave against medical advice!
- After your positive test results come in, do self isolate for the appropriate amount of time – 10 days minimum people! Don’t go back to your busy
medical practiceworkplace earlier saying that you feel fine!
Ugh, I am really starting to not like people very much at all!
(All of the above scenarios may or may not be real, and may or may not all have happened in the last 2 weeks)
High days
…and holidays. So, yesterday was a public holiday here in SA, the day of Reconciliation. I think we are all just becoming reconciled to the fact that Covid is here to stay, this little virus, that everyone thought would affect us for a month or 2 is now a year down the line and going strong! If you think that a microscopic virus is holding the entire world hostage – it’s quite mind-blowing. Agh, well.
The day off was a day on call, fortunately not busy, but I did have to go in a see a patient in the late afternoon, because the casualty ward was too busy with Covid to administer a nausea injection to a pregnant woman battling Hyperemesis Gravidarum (severe morning sickness). These are the stressors of our days!
I did manage to get a lot of sewing done – giftsofor friends are done – for those asking – tablecloths and placemats – so not challenging sewing, just time consuming. and I managed to make 2 new scrub tops for myself – the ones I made at the beginning of lockdown are pure polyester – thick and hot – and are also starting to look a bit shabby, so I found some lighter poly cotton and made 2, including a Christmassy one! I made some jam last week, and have baked a couple of Christmas cakes, and this weekend I will make some Christmas biscuits, and then I am ready to go! I’m not feeling very festive, but am trying to get into the spirit – you know, ‘fake it till you make it’ kind of a thing!
Right, this Thursday diary isn’t going to clear itself, so let me get to work!
11
…days to Christmas! Eek! How are we all doing? Have we finished our Christmas shopping and gifting? Are our plans coming together for the events of the season? I’m feeling relatively under control, especially because no-one will actually be here!
So we heard towards the end of last month that it was unlikely my brother and his family would come down, which was a bit of a let down, particularly since we had had an offer of a rental for our beach house in December which we had declined! And, it would have been nice to see them – we haven’t seen them in a long while! But, anyway, Covid is as Covid does, and with rising numbers and their finances not playing ball, it’s an understandable decision. My other brother is supposed to come down for ironman with his family and friends at the end of January, but I am not sure, despite the organisers assurances, that it will go ahead. Ironman weekend usually puts a little strain on our medical teams and hospitals, so I’m not quite sure how they will accommodate those participants who might need medical intervention in the current situation! So, maybe we won’t be seeing them either in January then.
Of Charles’s family – his brother and his adult children will be coming down to the mountains for Christmas, and since I will have to be taking care of my dad over this time, I’m not sure I will be able to get to see much of them. My dad’s carer was given leave on the assumption that my brother would be here to help me out, but alas, that will be my solo responsibility. I’m quite stressed about that actually. I do not cope well with him at all anymore, not because he is ‘difficult’, but I just can’t bear to see this half person anymore.
SO, visits are cancelled, gifts are in production – I’ve been sewing up a storm, baking to follow this week. And then, finally a call this weekend to endure before I clock out for the season. Roll on a (stressful) break.
And so
…just like that, Prep School is done, roll on 2021 and Primary begins!
last day shenanigans! 
As opposed to the first day of grade 1!
and the first day at Prep school! Gosh, she has grown and time had flown!
(we ended up closing school on Wednesday – too many teacher exposures and an admin staff member had tested positive – and given that reports were done, the kids had all had a fun day with their teacher, and we called it. Now for the endless summer holiday!)
What a kid!
…I have the best kid in the world, apologies to the rest of you who think yours is pretty special. Mine takes the cake!
Yesterday we had a farewell Mothers and Daughters’ picnic as we prepare to leave the preparatory school before heading off to the primary school. Because of Covid and all the drama that comes along with it, final assembly has been cancelled, so the headmistress decided to at least announce the trophy winners for the year. No sports achievements unfortunately, but, my kid won the Recorder trophy (heaven help my ears!) and then…drumroll… she took top donors with the Principal’s award. This trophy is given for amongst other things – top academic achievement, leadership, and embodiment of all the school’s values – honesty, respect, caring, responsibility. I couldn’t be any prouder of her. Despite all the challenges over this last year – she has shone!
Thandi with her principal.
Mountain run
…so after being totally ambivalent about an organised trail run that I had entered in the mountains nearby (but Covid, but had I trained enough to run tough half, I remember crying over this run previously, not doing it, but, Ive entered and its a cool top, which I won’t wear if I don’t run, argh!), I had an absolutely awful Friday, and by the evening, I had made up my mind – I was going to run it. So, early Saturday I jumped in the car, drove the hour and a half to the mountains, completed registration which meant we each got a timing chip, and because runners were timed mat to mat, we could start our run at whatever appropriately socially distanced time we wanted to. Knowing I would be out there for a while, I set off quite close to the start and had quite a fabulous run.
The air was crisp, the pines were fragrant, the forest, cool and quiet, the hills were brutal, the views magnificent, my soul was happy. Except when I tripped and fell. Then I was winded and bruised – more ego than anything else…
It’s all a
…numbers game. As the Covid-19 numbers go up, so my work profile changes. As they continue to rise, I end up doing less of my own work, and more administrative work.
It’s rough in our little city at the moment guys. The hospitals are full, they started out full of other stuff, and this time, because there is no limitation we are continuing to be busy with other stuff – trauma, other illnesses, alcohol related accidents. And now throw in the Covid-19 admissions. The numbers in hospital are higher than during the first wave, so there is severe pressure on everyone. Many of my colleagues are fatigued and have little capacity left to do the job that is required of them.
There is also financial pressure – I have not earned anywhere close to my expectations and budgeted-for-income, so work that needs doing must be done, but, there are no beds for hospital admissions! And there are some patients who have other emergencies, and it is challenging finding beds for those patients with ectopic pregnancies, miscarriages, cancers… It’s a mess. All a big mess…
And in the midst of this I try to be an ethical doctor, a caring colleague and a sympathetic employer. These numbers are getting me down.
A pinch
…and a punch for the first of the month!
How is it December? People! I can’t believe it. Mentally I’m still stuck somewhere in about May (I’m at last out of March and April now), but crikey, I’m blown away that it is already the final month of the year.
So, it’s the time of the year that starts to call for reflection and forward planning, but given the Covid crisis ongoing, I guess, we just keep that finger hovering over the pause/play button, waiting to get going again. My grand plan for 2021 has been put on hold until 2022. After the economic disaster of 2020, I need to earn some money and throw myself into clinical work, before I throw myself into an MBA. Yip, it’s time, I need to find an after Gynae plan. So, an MBA with a medical focus, and then I can start looking at systems consulting, slowly easing myself out of the clinical field. I doubt I’ll ever be able to fully leave it – I love what I do too much, but, I am very aware of what it takes from me and my family and how 1 dimensional I become. I can’t do this for another 15 – 20 years and be a nice person at the end of that.
So, December, I’m coming for you! Let’s do this!
Charlie's Bird 