Charlie's Bird

living the dream with Charlie and Thandi and chirping all the way back to the nest.

Archive for February, 2019

Celebrating

…memories and milestones.

Yesterday was an emotional day – it would have been Dawn’s 82nd birthday. I miss her with an agonising heartache. Grief doesn’t come with a linear timeline; and there are days I feel like my heart may just squeeze out of my chest, such is my feeling of loss. Yesterday was one of those. Midmorning I found myself driving to a meeting, with sobs exploding out of me. I spent some time with my dad yesterday, but he really is just a half person now, and I could see him really struggling with his aching heart too yesterday. But, we both pulled ourselves together and celebrated her at dinner last night.

In other news, all my ministrations seem to be paying off – between the Chiro, the massage therapist, the biokineticist, my brother coach and some medication, I seem to have hit a break through in my running. So here is hoping that it all comes together in time for next Sunday. RM, I am so looking forward to those hours on the road with you! I am nervous as anything, but ready as I will be!

 

Gratitude Journal

…instead of the moans and groans of an aching body and soul, I am going to start gratitude journalling. Hopefully I will start to lighten and brighten up – we all know the old adage of faking it till you make it, so here goes.

  • I am grateful for a career that challenges me, uses my brain and my skills, and allows me to have an impact on people’s lives.
  • I am grateful for a sunshiny day.
  • I am grateful to know I am loved.

It’s a hard knock life

…and none of us get away without the knocks, we just have to get better at dodging them. Did any of you watch that TV series, Wipeout? It was this ridiculous game show, where contestants had to avoid obstacles and try to get the end of the course in the fastest time? There was a wall with little doors in it that the contestant had to move along; and periodically without warning, those little doors would open and a spring loaded punch would explode out, catching the hapless victim in the face/groin/chest/stomach. It feels like at the moment I am managing a situation like that. Random doors keep opening and punches keep catching me, I barely have time to catch my breath before the next one hits. And sherbet I am tired of it. And it feels like forces are conspiring to keep me at the wall face, so that I can’t even kisch out on my bum and breath, checking for broken bones.

But I think to a greater or lesser degree that is all of us, isn’t it? Chatting to an acquaintance this morning, her father, after what should have been a minor routine surgery, can no longer walk properly and was diagnosed with prostate cancer, all this while her mom is lying in hospital with bleeding from her bowels, but needing anticoagulation meds (which will make it worse) which she has to have for the cardiac stents she has in her heart. And then these an attorney friend, a case hasn’t gone the way a client hoped it would, and now they are threatening him with their own legal action. And then there is a young OBGYN who is really overwhelmed by the practice she is running, she is struggling to make decisions and be ‘the boss’, she is finding herself more and more isolated; in a word, she’s lonely…

All these unavoidable punches, but how to stay upright despite them? I’m not sure.

Stress

…is a monster. It eats away at happiness, sucks the life out of a soul. A friend of ours is going through some pretty revolting stress at the moment; and we are watching him turn into a dry husk, a shadow of himself. I once again am reminded of what it is doing to me.

Valentining

… so I hosted my annual Valentine’s dinner on Saturday night. I do love it all – thinking up a theme, designing a menu and then bringing it all together on the day. This year was no exception!

Introducing the Royal Affair – a meal fit for a king and queen.

On that menu…

  • CanapĂ© – fish and chips, with a pea sorbet
  • Starter – bangers and truffle mash with a yorkshire pud and caramelized onions
  • Palate cleanser – a G&T sorbet
  • Mains – a lamb crown roast, with steamed green veggies and fondant potatoes
  • Dessert – sticky toffee pudding with vanilla ice cream
  • Petit four platter – miniature toffee apples, port and Stilton truffles, elderflower jellies and tiara biscuits.

It seemed to all go down well, and I think my friends may want to come again next year!

2 years

… since I saw your gentle face, 2 years since I bid you well on your journey. I wish it wasn’t so. I wish you were still reading my little lady stories. There’s so much to tell you. I miss you anew every day…

Recovery Tuesday

…I am really buggered this morning. I tried to run this morning, but that was a bit if a fail, it became a run/walk/knyp*. My joints were really still quite sore, and I thought they would loosen up a bit, but they didn’t really.. Let’s hope tomorrow is a bit easier on me. This being aged thing is rough!

So in an effort to recover from things I am going to (try and) take it easy today. Stop that, I can hear your eyes rolling from here! While I have 1 patient in labour, who I fear is going to need a caesarian section – it’s a big baby and she is overdue, so she is not a stressor today; and I have a lunch date planned with an old friend, and then this evening I intend to do some prep work for my annual Valentine’s dinner. And I will go to bed early! To sleep, perchance to dream…

* knyp loosely translated means pinch – my guts were not cooperating this morning