Charlie's Bird

living the dream with Charlie and Thandi and chirping all the way back to the nest.

Archive for March, 2014

Sunrise

…and today the news was there. Gareth Cliff was presenting his final show. And I had a bit of a panicked moment. You see, I might have mentioned it before or if you know me, you will have noticed – I don’t like change, I really don’t. And for a long time now, my routine has been alarm goes off, radio on, catch the last of the really early show, then enjoy GC. And now that is about to change, and that has made me a little sad. I know change is inevitable, and it must happen, but it doesn’t stop the little sad part in my head.

Now, a bit of an ode to GC. When I first encountered GC on 5, I was enthralled by his dry wit and insights. Charlie never used to listen to the radio, preferring cds and mp3s instead, and slowly I even got him listening to the radio, and so we got to ‘know’ the radio persona of Mr Cliff (as much as anyone ‘knows’ a celeb). He was controversial; he was insightful and was never afraid to say the things that needed to be said. It often got him into trouble (BCCSA anyone?) and lost him a listener or 2. But I enjoyed and appreciated him. In fact I would go as far as saying he has been the voice of reason of my generation. He represents many of my beliefs and gets a chance to put them out there. For that I am grateful. I now know that I am not a lone opinion rattling in my own head, there are others like us out there, who share these opinions and thoughts. Whatever he does next will be great, I am sure, and I wish him well. I tweeted this morning that I hope he goes into politics, because at least then I’d have someone to vote for.

I just don’t think he realises what he has done to my morning routine, damnit! Who else is going to get me smiling on the way to work?

Weighing in

…so, if anyone has been watching the fatness files v2.1, you might have noticed I reached quite a milestone yesterday – 10 kilograms down! (and a further 0.5kg down this morning!) Woohoo! I am the lightest I have been in years – less even than when I got married and I thought I was looking quite good then. I am so chuffed – double digits is a huge mind change. My old clothes are fitting again, my new clothes fit me properly now, instead of pulling at the seems. I am feeling physically better, and (don’t tell a soul) but I seem to be having less noisy breathing at night. I know I still have a long way to go – probably another 10, but I am getting there, we are winning step-by-step; kg-by-fat-kg. And the best part is, I am not feeling at the end of my tether with ‘dieting’. I am enjoying my food, enjoying the lifestyle change and happy to sustain this for the foreseeable future.

Playing mom

… I have so many posts mulling in my head at the moment – there is the update on my diet/exercise/weight thing; there is the one about noses and their joints, there is the one about friendships; but I’ve settled on the one about being a mommy this morning.

So, with the end of term coming, Teacher Sal arranged a school outing to the local pizza joint and the aquarium. So at 9 this morning I headed off to school to fetch Thandi and off we went. We started at the aquarium, the children got to look at the fish in the tanks, then headed off for a penguin interaction. Thandi was very brave, sitting right next to the guy who was doing the talking, touching and stroking the penguin. She loved it! We looked at the seals – sadly their pool is being renovated, so there isn’t a show at the moment, but they were cute and curious as always.

Then it was off to the pizza parlour for a bit of playtime and pizza making session! The owners were awesome with the kids, giving them all sorts of funny instructions to make and decorate those pizza’s, and once they were out of the oven, the children gobbled them up. They went on a treasure hunt, to find some suckers and balloons, and then it was milkshake and home time. They had such fun. And I felt so privileged to share it with Thandi. I know there will be lots of school outings I won’t make, so it made this one even more special. And she was so chuffed when I rocked up at school – ‘MY MOMMY!’ she yelled, grabbing her bag and running towards me. What an angel! I really do try to make the most of our time together, but I do end up with a heavy heart sometimes – I miss out on so much; I know I can’t get this time back with her, and it is flying by… Saying that, it only makes my eyes leak to think about it too much, so I try not to. Hope she knows just how much I love her…

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Weekend realising

…it was a long weekend. There were highlights, there were lowlights. A lot of the lows were triggered by old triggers, triggers I had forgotten about… but there they were slapping me around the ears. The sum of it was a long weekend that has left me tired and slightly anxious about the coming 2 weeks (on call this weekend…)

Some of the highlights included getting stuck into my new recipe books last night and making a couple of things which a busy dehydrating in my dehydrator; a walk uninterrupted run of 6km, with hills; a lovely meal with friends on Thursday evening; a dinner out with my parents on Saturday; spending time with my gorgeous girl – who is tragically nursing a cold (damn germs!). The lows… well, lets just leave it at the lows.

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It’s the (long) weekend, Baby!

Shoowee! 7 hours of work to get through and the weekend will begin! Yay!

Starting off with a coffee date with a friend this afternoon, dinner with some of Charlie’s friends tonight and then we are off to the beach house for the rest of the time. I’ll hopefully get a few runs in and spend some time on the beach, if the weather is good! I’m very excited to see the beach house, I recently commissioned a company to make us some new blinds and curtains, and they are installing them today, so I can’t wait to see what it all looks like now! Slowly, slowly I will get new linens and some new pictures onto the walls.  I’m also keen to get a new couch and a few things like that… You know what beach houses become eventually – dumping ground for all the old worn out stuff from home, so it’s going to be great to just renew and refresh it all!

I think I’ve mentioned that I am delving a little further into the raw food world, thanks to my friend, JBT. So yesterday my dehydrator arrived! Yay! I was so excited to try it, stopped off at the health store, picked up the last few ingredients I needed to get some recipes started, only to get home and discover that Charlie had finished all my cashew nuts, so I was severely limited in what I could do:-( I was seriously grumpy about that! I eventually pulled myself together after a good old sulk, and made a teeny batch of raw brownies and raw chocolate fudge. The brownies are still dehydrating away and the fudge was a blend and refrigerate recipe, and tastes delicious! Yay for healthy treats! Today I need to get some more cashews, some buckwheat and get some recipes started! I love experimenting like this!

So there you have it, hope your weekends are good! Chat on the other side!

 

Dietary woes

… you know, for 2 and a half months now I have been fairly religious on diet. I occasionally have a glass of wine, occasionally a raw chocolate (sugar free), occasionally a carb free, sugar free treat. And even less occasionally a dessert. But all in all, I have counted calories, I have exercised, I have been good; and then my hormones go and throw me a curve ball. I am day 4 today and have gained nearly 2 kgs in like 3 days. Man oh man, is that frustrating! I have been monitoring my centimetre loss too, and it’s nice to see that going down, but, I don’t know about you, I need to see those improving numbers on the scale, damnit! Anyway, I’ll just keep plodding along and we will see where I get to.

On that note, being day 4, I guess I should give you an update. For the last 3 cycles now I have not been able to start stimulating my ovaries. For various reasons my body is just not playing ball. In a last ditch attempt to get things under control, my doctor has started me on the pill for 2 weeks, and then we will see what my ovaries have then done, and see if we could get off the ground. Charlie and I are preparing ourselves for a negative outcome, and we are getting closer to a place of acceptance. If that’s really ever possible. I really do hope though that my healthier living and weight loss will stand me in good stead. I am trying…

On the dietary front, a new recipe for today appears on the Foodie Files page – I made a cauliflower crust pizza last night – yum! Not bread, couldn’t taste the cauliflower and it was tasty! Check it out!

Did I win?

…when Thandi saw me after my half marathon yesterday, she asked, “Mommy, Mommy, did you win your race?” And while the automatic answer is no, of course I didn’t, considering the winners ran in in just over an hour, and I finished in just less than 3, of course I didn’t. But I guess the greater victory is that I did it. I persevered and finished, thanks to some incredible support from RT and MJ. I really don’t think I would have hauled myself over the finish line without them. They walked when I needed to walk, they cajoled and encouraged when I ran out of steam, and they were just there. Thanks guys!

The brain is  such an incredibly powerful thing, and it keeps telling me I can’t be doing things like this; that I am slow, fat and unfit; that it’s too hard; that I can’t. And it takes all of my strength, and I mean all of my strength to overcome it. I can barely talk while I am running, hardly notice those beautiful surroundings, because I am gritting my teeth and fighting the biggest battle in my head. But that battle I won! And the tears I shed afterwards were tears of relief… because, goddamnit, yes I did win…I won MY race.

I really hope my brain finally starts believing in me a little more now, so that I can start to enjoy this running lark.