Charlie's Bird
living the dream with Charlie and Thandi and chirping all the way back to the nest.Archive for June, 2020
projects
…so I have really had some fun with these embroidery tasks I have tackled!
It’s been fun experimenting with some new techniques and some non-techniques and just playing! I’ve been looking at a project called a year of stitching – every day for a year you sew a bit of stitching/button onto a piece of fabric – some people really do amazing things. Watch this space for updates if I do tackle it!
Hibernating
…I really needed this weekend. I limited my social media interactions, I generally spend quite a bit of time reading posts, watching news, and this weekend I kept it quiet, which calmed my brain a bit. I spent a lot of time thinking about my personal goals and ambitions, and that also helped me with a little perspective.
I baked and cooked ! On Saturday I filled up our biscuit tins – peanut butter choc chip cookies, whipped shortbread, greek pistachio biscuits, and Jessie’s biscuits (a bit of a snap kind of biscuit with everything in it – oats, coconut, corn flakes). I tried a new recipe – lovely mutton ribs on a bed of mushroom risotto. And yesterday I got T to help me with making chilli con carne – a firm favourite in our house!
I ran and walked – 10km on Saturday, 11km yesterday. Enjoying the cooler weather, but not the wind, and enjoying some company!
I am working on my next embroidery project, I hope to finish it off tonight, then I will share the photos.
Running
…so I thought it might be time to reassess the running. Inspired by https://thegaboronerunner.com post yesterday, I knew it was time to revisit my fitness, my goals and my plans.
This whole lockdown thing has made it so hard. When we went into hard lockdown I had managed to secure an elliptical and I strode my way through the time, along with running on the spot and sound the pool. I made some good progress with strength training and all was good. Once lockdown eased and we were able to run from 6-9 in the mornings – well, that didn’t rally work for me. Winter was coming and it was too dark for me to run at 6am on my own, especially since I have a scary open bushy area to run past where some crooks are known to lurk. So, no time to run in the morning. For the first week, I maintained running in the garden, but once I’d tasted freedom I could not contemplate the elliptical anymore. So now with the second easing we can run 6am-6pm, but again; I can’t run in the morning, (too dark, too dangerous solo) and I really struggle with afternoons (my days are unpredictable and I’m often just finished after a busy day). Also, I have to finish my run by about 5:30pm because its getting dark and scary again… I am a much better person when I get up at 4:30 and run at 5, as horrific as that sounds, even in winter – in fact I love running in the dark in winter – but with people! Also, running in the morning just starts my day off on the correct note. I am better able to cope with the strains and stressors of the day. But a beggar can’t be a chooser?
I am getting at least 3 runs in a week, so I am maintaining, but certainly not improving. Weight gain has been an issue – these Covid kilos are not helping! My feet were starting to give me some grief, and when I calculated the mileage on my ‘new’ shoes – there were over 800km – for a fat person, that’s too many! So I found some new shoes on sale (shopping mojo for the win!) and am at least feeling comfortable with those again!
In terms of goals – my racing calendar is done.
Romecancelled and new date next year, entry guaranteedRhodesnew date given by organisers, in October, but I suspect that will change again, and I am not going to be able to get away then to run anyway – too high risk, and with this base, there is no way I will be ultra ready in time.Chicagonot yet cancelled, but I doubt our borders will be open this year to allow me to travel, guaranteed entry for 2021, but I will need to pay for it again, and it is the most expensive marathon I’ve ever entered.another international halfnow that Charlie is no longer based in the UK, my plans for another half marathon later in the year, on another visit to him, are scuppered.Wild Women on the Runit has been postponed to September this year, but even if it goes ahead, as a health care worker, there is no way I will be able to get away in September safely.
Initially I was very motivated to take part in all the various virtual runs and challenges, but my spirit has just quit for now. I’m done trying to be excited about another training run pretending to be a race. I miss the nervous excited anticipation before a race, seeing my friends and enjoying having fun on a race with friends. I miss the camaraderie of fellow runners, encouraging words and cheers from spectators. I really just can’t with the virtual anymore (anyone noticed that even zoom virtual socialising has disappeared too?) I need the real.
So for now, I am trying to take my own personal pressure off. I am trying to just run without a clear defined goal, which is very hard for a type A planner. I hope that one day I will get to line up again with friends and run a race I am proud of. But for now I will try to embrace running for physical and mental health.
Fighting
…the fake news and conspiracy theories. I was extremely offended last night. I commented on a friend’s facebook post, and someone he is friends with accused me of spreading hearsay, and asked what qualified me to comment on the state of our hospitals. He went on in multiple replies to other people and proved that he has bought into every single conspiracy theory about Covid-19. And I realised, reading his vitriol that I need to unpack some of this for my friends.
- It really matters little where the virus came from, whether it was from bats, pangolins or manufactured in a lab. It is here, it is a problem and we need to find solutions.
- The virus is not as deadly as first assumed, however, it is deadly, and I don’t want anyone to get it, because what if they defy the odds and do not recover.
- It is a very infectious virus, especially if one does not employ the social distancing requirements.
- Wearing a mask protects others, should you be infected; and it does reduce the transmission from positives to negatives.
- The big issue is that so many people are sick simultaneously that they are overwhelming the hospitals. Yes, the other illnesses are still there and are often more deadly, but this is an additional burden on our (especially state) ailing health service.
- Because so many people are flooding into our hospitals, there are very few beds for any of those other patients that may require help. In my hospital this means that there are 24 beds to share between all the gynaecologists, urologists, plastic surgeons (they do more than just cosmetic work!) and neurosurgeons. That is 24 beds between 18 specialists. This is a massive issue in terms of my ability to earn an income.
- Lots of nursing staff have been infected, and a lot of doctors too. Thankfully, they are all recovering and starting to return to work.
- This will pass, but there is going to be a lot lost during this journey. And not just money.
- A lot of government regulations seem bizarre, and while we can challenge them on it, it is not up to us to break the rules because we disagree. This sounds like an immature society that does this. Everyone lauds New Zealand’s approach – it worked because the population are compliant and obedient. (it also helps that it is an island and you can really shut the country down)
- If we had not had the hard lockdown, both our infection and death rate would have been far higher than it is. I’m not saying it isn’t coming for us, but, it would have been a lot worse already.
- In some areas the local governments and municipalities have been fairly transparent in their lack of planning, and it shows that they have been stalling to allow loyal cadres to be rewarded with lucrative overpriced tenders. I hate that this is mainly in my province. I hate that the people I love and care for will be (once again) affected by this. I hate that I feel completely helpless to stop this. I hate that there will be another ineffectual commission of enquiry in a few years time and no-one will pay for their greed.
I think this illness is going to be career defining for me. watch this space.
A stitch in time
…
so, in the midst of an unplanned on call weekend I managed to get off the couch, dig through my embroidery box, finding all the things I needed and played with some embroidery art. It’s got various names – needle painting, embroidery art, thread painting. One of the artists who is inspiring the people is a Russian artist – Shimunia. Look her up, her work is incredible. I need to just trim the edges of my piece and overlock them, and then it is ready to hang.
Father’s Day was nice, the 3 of us went and did a greeting dance on my Dad’s balcony and handed over gifts to him, his helper is just a gem, so she helped us make a big fuss of him, and made sure he had a good looking Sunday lunch! God, it’s hard to see him though, he really is lost in his mind, as it wanders around, At least he still knows all of us, but, damn, it breaks me every time I see him. And it makes me miss my mom even more.
(the weekend was dead quiet work wise, until last night – I was up most of it with a delivery – yawn)
Rinse and repeat
…the days are feeling quite blurry again… they all seem to be blurring into one. I’m trying to find some motivation to tackle a crafting project, but it seems like all I can do is plan. The thought of actually going through my embroidery box and looking at what supplies I have and what I need to get is overwhelming. The idea of sitting at my sewing machine just seems too much, and the whiff of oil paint isn’t tempting me, even though I have prepared canvasses ready to go… Inertia sucks…
Coronacoaster
…I know we’ve all seen that meme… I know we all get that feeling, but man, this weekend was insane.
One of my associates tested positive on Saturday which has obviously been something we have been anticipating. We called in the cleaners, the practice underwent a deep clean, and her office is obviously closed up for the next 2 weeks, while she hopefully recovers well. We are all considered low risk contacts, aside from her nurse, who we have sent home to self isolate and monitor herself for any symptoms. Now the awkward part – contacting all the patients she has seen in the last week, breaking the news to them and asking that they maintain good social distancing and monitor for symptoms. Aitog!
The weekend was good otherwise. I got some good runs in – 5km in new shoes that gave me a little blister, and then I took on the Comrades virtual 21km on Sunday with a 3 friends. We socially distanced, wore our masks and had a pleasant morning out. We even stopped for coffee en route – a la Moscow style! It was a good experience, but 21km felt very very long…
Eating was good this weekend, too good, I ate too much! Friday night was take away pizza night, Saturday I made Georgian food – Khinkali which are these delicious giant dumplings, and Khachapuri – a cheesy filled bread – so good! I also made Russian biscuits called sushki and these amazing sweetened cottage cheese bars coated in chocolate. Sunday, after my big run, I decided to make beef wellington – Gordon Ramsey’s recipe is delicious, especially the sauce… yum, yum, yum!
Anyway, Monday is here, it’s a big week, enjoy the holiday tomorrow, my fellow South Africans…
Brrr
…who left the door open in Antarctica? Flip, it’s cold… I know, I know, not really that cold here in my little city, but cold for us. It is all relative, after all. The wind is howling, and it is icy…
I other (more exciting) news, it’s the weekend, Baby! Whoop! I am not on call, and I am looking forward to some freedom from thinking about Covid-19 for 5 minutes. It is completely all consuming, and is never far from my brain. With this weather though, it promises to be a quiet weekend, on the couch, in front of the sewing machine, in the kitchen…
Can I just say I am tired of the quiet now. I’d love a little excitement, something to look forward to. In fact, I think that is the issue, I have nothing to look forward to. I can’t say, ‘If I just get through the next week/10days/month(pick your time goal), I’ll achieve this/go there/see so-and-so/run this race.’ Not being able to set goals and plan around them is, in fact, what is really wearing me down.
Pockets of warm air
…so while the last few months have seen me lurch between bleak despair, moody depression and then ‘pull-yourself-together’ pragmatism, every now and again there seems to be a pocket of warm air. Pockets where it doesn’t hurt to take a breath, where the held back tears don’t burn at the back of my throat, and I get to laugh and smile and recall who I used to be. Tuesday evening was one of those, I had a diem regularis. Work, meetings, putting out fires, easing anxiety, and then I had an awful run (leaden legs), but I got home to a family that was happy and we sat around a braai fire, grilled some chicken, and then, because the weather was just so perfect, we ate outdoors and chatted and teased and laughed and giggled. My memories of that evening are gold tinged. I keep seeing us together, and knowing how blessed I am. I have a most excellent husband and the most amazing kid. A safe home, a too full tummy (the scale does not lie about those Covid kgs), everything my heart desires.
In the midst of the storm I find myself in, there are indeed pockets of warm air, that allow me to breath.
Weekend woes
…so early on Saturday morning Thandi and I headed off for our regular run. Along the way we had arranged to find a friend and then we were going to run together for a bit, with appropriate social distancing, mind you. It was to be a good day. Until, a mere 500m into my run, instead of running like a gazelle, prancing along, I found myself face down on the pavement. Much the princess and the pea, a small bump on the pavement tripped me up. As it would happen my fall from grace was witnessed by a middle aged man repairing his flat tyre, who rushed over, offering his phone; and a tow truck driver who pulled over and was ready to call an ambulance. Flip!
I was winded so was just trying to get my breath back was a challenge. but once I managed to stand up I found the roastie on my right knee, and very sore hands after they caught the brunt of the fall. Anyway. I brushed myself off and started a slow walk, until I felt recovered, and thenI managed to run again. I managed to get through 10km in fact, but my left wrist really started to ache and I realised that moving it was agony…
Since I was on call, I headed into work to do my rounds and then found a friendly radiographer to take some photos of me, which fortunately dod not reveal a break, but mid afternoon I got a call back from the radiologist (he’s the doctor assessing the images, the radiographer is the photographer) who thinks I have disrupted some ligaments in amongst the small bones of my hand… Damnit. A hand injury from a run. Really?
By yesterday a few other bruises and sore spots had revealed themselves – my ribs are tender! And my shoulders. Oh well, super weird, but I will live to tell the tale. The sunrise we witnessed made the injury worthwhile…
Charlie's Bird 