Charlie's Bird

living the dream with Charlie and Thandi and chirping all the way back to the nest.

And it rains!

…and it’s cooler, thank heavens! After 2 weeks of ridiculous heat and humidity – how we functioned and slept, I’m not sure, it has now cooled down. The rain began yesterday afternoon and hasn’t really stopped. What a pleasure! It’s also means we are going to have a lovely cool weekend in the mountains. I am looking forward to that!

In other news, my body continues to flummox me and my doctor. Day 1 arrived a week early this month, and my scan does not correlate with this event, so we are stumped. I’ve had to do blood tests to try to figure it all out. All this confusion in the body is, as they say is the best of British reality TV, ‘doing my ‘ed in’. I, obviously, still believe in miracles and wonder, and honestly believe that it is possible for me to become pregnant again; but (and it’s a big but) I’m beginning to wonder if the cost – emotional and physical – is now getting to high. I have been a very good patient over the last 4 years, but I am really battling now. I really am tired of this feeling of dread and stress that I am forced to live with – dread because of what complications will I go through this month, stress because I am battling to plan anything – weekends away, runs, family time – and I am a control freak, I need to be in control. I’m also really tired of trying to justify why I want another child. I just do. Normally fertile people never have to justify these things, why should I? And I know, believe me, quite how blessed I am to have Thandipants in my world. She rocks!

Ai, another whiny whingey post, sorry, I am so damn frustrated…

1 Comment»

  countesskaz wrote @

whinge away, its your blog. hope it makes you feel better to vent. it always makes me feel better.

try for another baby/ies. you’ll regret not trying. I’m holding thumbs for you and Charlie. who knows? maybe by the end of the year, you’ll be holding that baby/those twins/triplets!

I’m an eternal optimist and I believe in great things for your family…

keep at it !


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